Christian Biblical Counsel: SELF-CENTEREDNESS

See Loving and Serving Others, as the opposite of self-centeredness.

1.   Love is not self-seeking.

1 Cor. 13:5. … does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil.

2.   Selfish ambition brings its bitter fruit.

James 3:14–16. But if you have bitter envy and self-seeking in your hearts, do not boast and lie against the truth. This wisdom does not descend from above, but is earthly, sensual, demonic. For where envy and self-seeking exist, confusion and every evil thing are there.

3.   Jesus condemned James and John for their self-seeking attitude, and he calls us all to humble service.

Matt. 20:20–28.

Matt. 20:26–28. “Yet it shall not be so among you; but whoever desires to become great among you, let him be your servant. And whoever desires to be first among you, let him be your slave—just as the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life a ransom for many.”

4.   Jesus calls us to self-denial.

Luke 9:23–25. Then He said to them all, “If anyone desires to come after Me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily, and follow Me. For whoever desires to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for My sake will save it. For what profit is it to a man if he gains the whole world, and is himself destroyed or lost?”

5.   Don’t be self-centered, but think of others.

1 Cor. 10:24. Let no one seek his own, but each one the other’s well-being.

6.   Follow Jesus’ example by thinking of how to please others.

Rom. 15:2–3. Let each of us please his neighbor for his good, leading to edification. For even Christ did not please Himself; but as it is written, “The reproaches of those who reproached You fell on Me.”[1]


[1] Kruis, J. G. (1994). Quick scripture reference for counseling (electronic ed.). Grand Rapids, MI: Baker Book House.

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