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MINNEAPOLIS, MN—In a bold move designed to take their growing church to the next level, a team of vision pastors at Lakeside Community Church announced Monday the church would now be offering a full salvation package completely free of a Savior. The deal includes full access to church functions and fun events, as well as […]
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VATICAN CITY—The Roman Catholic Church is celebrating Reformation Day in style, by offering thousands of hot deals on indulgences for the forgiveness of the temporal punishments for sin in purgatory. A crazed-looking Pope Francis ran an infomercial throughout the day Tuesday, marking the 500th anniversary of the Protestant Reformation by offering hourly lightning deals on […]
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MOUNTAIN VIEW, CA—In a move showing remarkable veneration for one of the most pivotal events in human history, internet search giant Google marked the 500th anniversary of the Protestant Reformation by not making any mention of it at all on its home page. The corporation, which often pays homage to significant birthdays, holidays, and historic […]
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HOLLYWOOD, CA—In the wake of the recent Harvey Weinstein scandal sending shockwaves through Hollywood, the nation’s elite members of the entertainment industry have expressed their puzzlement at the fact that the country has fallen so far in morality and ethics, when the very same people have created and promoted entertainment that celebrates moral bankruptcy, sources […]
NEW YORK, NY—In a move designed to finally give an on-air voice to the nation’s conservative Christians, producers of popular morning talk show The View confirmed Monday the addition of preacher and author John MacArthur to the show. In internal test footage, MacArthur reportedly held his own against the flurry of conversation coming from the […]
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HOUSTON, TX—Pastor Joel Osteen of Lakewood Church is a bestselling author, motivational speaker, and preacher—and now, he’s also the head of a profitable pastoral fashion line: “Sheep’s Clothing by Joel Osteen.” The line of suits, pants, shirts, ties, and dress shoes is designed to distract from a pastor’s empty theology and dangerous heresies by disguising […]
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