Category Archives: Humor/Satire

Humor Collection for Monday June 25, 2018

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Not Very Sweet

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Woke Too Soon

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Can’t Find It

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Democrats are Flexible

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Actual Photo

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Take Your Pick

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Contrast

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Separation

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Story Time

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Thanks

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Hypocrisy

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Hypocrisy

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Sorry

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The American Left

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Outrage Machine

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Welcome to America

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A Misunderstanding

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Bow Control

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Without Government

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Opposing Factions Break Into Intense Dance-Off At SBC Annual Meeting

DALLAS, TX—Tension between various political and theological movements within the Southern Baptist Convention has set the stage for a historic annual meeting in Dallas this year, and those tensions almost immediately flared up on the first day of the convention, with an explosive dance-off breaking out just after SBC president Steve Gaines welcomed conference attendees. […]

The post Opposing Factions Break Into Intense Dance-Off At SBC Annual Meeting appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Nation’s Liberals Suddenly Opposed To Concept Of Diplomacy

U.S.—Immediately upon hearing the news that President Trump had met with Kim Jong Un in a promising first peace summit Tuesday, the nation’s liberals came out in “strong opposition” to the concept of international diplomacy. Democrats across the nation warned of the dangers of diplomacy, coincidentally just moments after news of the historic summit between […]

The post Nation’s Liberals Suddenly Opposed To Concept Of Diplomacy appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Californian Arrested For Concealed Carrying Bible Without Permit

SAN FRANCISCO, CA—Local San Francsico resident Matthew Pearson was arrested Wednesday morning for concealed carrying a Bible without the proper state permits, sources at the San Francisco Police Department confirmed. California law prohibits residents from carrying any written material that contradicts far-left progressive agendas without a difficult-to-obtain permit from the state. Hurdles applicants need to […]

The post Californian Arrested For Concealed Carrying Bible Without Permit appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Nation’s Evangelicals Warn They’ll Only Give Trump 1 Or 2 Hundred More Mulligans

U.S.—The vast majority of the nation’s evangelical Christians stressed Friday that they were “this close” to abandoning their support of Donald Trump as they coped with a seemingly endless string of moral scandals surrounding the president. “I swear, if 197 or so more egregious moral failings come to light, I am DONE supporting this guy,” […]

The post Nation’s Evangelicals Warn They’ll Only Give Trump 1 Or 2 Hundred More Mulligans appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Facebook Staffers Coach Mark Zuckerberg On Humanlike Behavior Ahead Of Congressional Testimony

MENLO PARK, CA—According to sources from within Facebook headquarters, interns and staffers at the social network were training Mark Zuckerberg on how to act human ahead of his expected congressional testimony this week. The team of employees instructed the Facebook CEO in disciplines like smiling without looking like a robot, laughing at the correct moment, […]

The post Facebook Staffers Coach Mark Zuckerberg On Humanlike Behavior Ahead Of Congressional Testimony appeared first on The Babylon Bee.

In Response To Growing Number Of Fistfights, London Mayor Bans Hands

LONDON—In response to a recent outbreak in fistfights, London mayor Sadiq Khan announced Monday a sweeping ban of hands in the city, effective immediately. “No excuses: there is never a reason to have hands in a modern, civil society. Anyone who does will be caught, and they will feel the full force of the law,” Khan said […]

The post In Response To Growing Number Of Fistfights, London Mayor Bans Handsappeared first on The Babylon Bee.

Movement That Demands Forceful Silencing Of All Opposing Viewpoints Unsure Why Nation So Divided

U.S.—A political movement that immediately demands that people they disagree with be forcefully silenced by myriad means such as having their sponsors pulled and having them fired from their jobs expressed Friday that they weren’t 100% sure why the nation was so polarized and divided. Lamenting the significant problem of America’s deep divisions while simultaneously […]

The post Movement That Demands Forceful Silencing Of All Opposing Viewpoints Unsure Why Nation So Divided appeared first on The Babylon Bee.