But Uriah slept at the door of the king’s house with all the servants of his lord, and went not down to his house. 2 Samuel 11:9
suggested further reading: Isaiah 57:15–21
David was frustrated when Uriah did not want to sleep with his wife, so he racked his brain, seeking time and ways to still bring that about. Previously David had sent Uriah “as a present to his house” (2 Sam. 11:8). Now David called Uriah to his table (2 Sam. 11:13).
By his own actions, David would prove himself guilty, though he was trying to do the opposite. In this we see how God removes every vestige of prudence and discretion from those who operate with a bad conscience. No one had yet accused David of wrongdoing, but even when his sin was unknown, he felt under pressure to cover it up. He began running in strange directions, first seeking one way out of his sin, then another.
When we despise the judgment of God and try to conserve our good reputation before others, God gives us our just reward by drawing us in the very opposite direction from where we want to go. He thus brings us by force to judgment. Let us carefully note, therefore, that a bad conscience will always be accompanied by torment, anxiety, and anguish.
If we wish to have true peace, let us have a good conscience and do right. Furthermore, let us not hope to have peace when we flee the presence of God, especially when we attempt to abolish his justice. Now the wicked, at times, are certainly dead to the disturbing pain of guilt, but this kind of peace is not lasting. The reason is that, instead of presenting themselves before God, they go farther from him.
To have sure and permanent peace, let us be careful to present ourselves before God and deeply examine our conscience. When we feel guilty, let us groan and sigh over our sins, then ask pardon of him who is ready to give us mercy when we come to him in sincerity of heart.
for meditation: The peace David was frantically trying to find was false. It only made him run farther from God and dragged him down into greater sin. Do you find yourself in the same frenzy? Do you try everything to escape the just reward of your sin? Turn to God, rather than from him, and find the peace that passes all understanding in the gospel of Jesus Christ.1
1 Calvin, J., & Beeke, J. R. (2008). 365 Days with Calvin (p. 353). Day One Publications; Reformation Heritage Books.
